Tuesday, May 26, 2009

A whole bunch of updates

So yesterday was the end to a nice three day holiday weekend. I had a conversation with Em regarding remembering our vets on memorial day, and she seemed to understand. Jude then helped me make some homemade bread. Well he watched while I made the bread anyway. He kept wanting to let his head drop to the right rather than working to keep his head up. So therefore, I rolled a towel, and put it beside him where he could drop his head. He was rather irritated with me.
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So I went about my business of making the bread, and when I looked over he had given up being irritated. and was sound asleep. I had to snap a few pictures of him because he was so cute sleeping in his chair.
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While I was busy in the kitchen. Emily put together her first set of smile boxes.
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You can help Emily with her project here. http://www.wix.com/emilyssmileboxes/loveemily

About five pm I was not feeling that great so I took Jude, and went for a nap in my bedroom. Em had some friends over so they occupied themselves upstairs. Jude had not really slept during the day so I figured it would be good for him to get some sleep. We snuggled close, and slept for about an hour. Unfortunately, little Jude was then not tired at bed time, and decided to stay up until 1:40am!!! He giggled, laughed, "talked", and thought it was play time. Mike took him upstairs so I could go to sleep since I had to go to work this morning. He had never pulled the "I am not going to sleep routine", and I couldn't help but laugh every time he would giggle. Mike, and I tried laying him in his bassinet, prior to taking him upstairs, but ever few seconds he would giggle. We would laugh every time his pterodactyl squeal would blast through the air. Jude, still is not eating at 100%, but he did pick up the pace a little yesterday. I asked Mike to follow Jocalyn's advice and talk to ECI, about sending a dietitian out.

So I mentioned my hairdresser in yesterdays blog, and I would like to tell you about her. It is one of those small world, fate type of stories. Mike's best friend owns a hair salon so he works there occasionally so I can get my hair done at no cost. One day Mike's friend explained that he had hired a new stylist and she was going to be fixing my hair at my next appointment. I trusted his judgement, and went in to see the new girl, Kim. Once there Kevin introduced me, "This is the girl I was telling you about with the blog". Kim squealed, and told me she read my blog everyday, and it had been passed to her by Erin. Turns out Erin is a friend of mine, and by small world rules she had learned about my family prior to working with Kevin. We talked in length about the blog, Jude, and her sister. You see Kims sister who is just a bit younger than she is was broad sided by a gentleman that ran a red light. She had a traumatic brain injury, and will never be the same again. Kim told me how they weren't sure if her sister would recover, and how when she did she was like a five year old. Her sister (who is just gorgeous!!) finally recovered to the point of being able to function on her own for a bit, but then reverts back. So when I go into see Kim we talk freely about the issues we face head on. It's like having someone there that speaks the same language you do fluently in a country where the language is not well known. This weekend Kim told me how she feels she had to mourn the sister she knew, and get to know the sister she has now. The brain injury completely changed her sisters entire personality. She said some changes are good, but some are also very challenging. She also mourns the loss of her parents in regards to how they have to care for her sister around the clock. I told her I understood because I had to mourn the idea of a normal healthy baby, and how our lives will never be the same in regards to freely going places on a whim.

We talked in detail about how you wonder so much, and if you are making the right decisions for your loved one. It was an in depth conversation that lasted the entire time I was there. I asked Kim what happened to the gentleman that hit her sister, and she said he wasn't well. It was just an accident, a freak horrible accident. He didn't mean to run the red light, and he wasn't drinking. He has a daughter too so he has had a very difficult time recovering from what happened....I cannot imagine. I feel horrible for both families. We both decided that incidents like this teach you a perspective on life that many people cannot grasp. It teaches you that all decisions cannot be reached immediately, and many diagnosis just don't have a finality to them. She said the worst part about a brain injury is the wait, so true, so true! Her sister once the life of the party now has sensory overload from places like the circus, and she just cannot handle it. Seizures plague her life, and daily medications are a necessity. It's a role we know very well because of Jude's issues. I understand how she says they don't like to complain because they still have her sister in their lives, but how it's been trying. She said "It's nice to have someone to talk to". I told her "I understand and I feel the same. It's like you don't want anything to happen to anyone, but it's nice that someone relates.....and gets it." We talk about how complex the brain is, and how amazing it can be.

Okay, moving on. I know I have been bragging on my daughter a lot lately, but well I just love her. Yesterday she had some friends over and one was a little boy. Boys will be boys I guess, and he told an ethnic joke that we all heard as kids in front of Emily. Mike happened to be in the room with them, and had his headphones on. Although, the kids didn't know he had them turned off, but he sat there quietly listening to see what would happen. He said he thought of correcting them, but wanted to hear what Emily would say. Emily didn't laugh........and her friend said "Oh let me guess... of course EMILY doesn't think it's funny". Emily replied, "No I don't think it's funny. When you talk about one person then it just leads to talking about another, and that's not nice!". So her friend told the other little girl in the room, "I will tell you more jokes later". Emily piped up that she thought that was a good idea so she didn't have to hear them. Mike was impressed, and I was VERY proud of her!!! I have tried to raise her that everyone is equal and we shouldn't be judged on our race, religion, or sexual preference, because that's how I feel. It was ironic that later that night Mike and I sat down to watch the movie Milk, and I was moved to tears. I remember my mother being furious that Harvey Milk was shot, and that the man that shot him presented the "Twinkie Defense", I couldn't believe I could recall her being so upset, but I did, it's like it flooded back to me!! I knew that if she could have been one of the 30,000 people holding a candle light vigil for him she would have been. I was very moved by that scene, and that the movie mixed in real footage.

Anyway, I guess I have blogged enough for today but I had a lot to say.


Midwest Mommy said...

I love when babies fall asleep in places besides their beds! So cute!
1:40 am that sucks! There I said it :-)

Colleen said...

Don't you love it when cute bugs fall asleep and look like perfect angels and then they party until the wee hours of the night. It's so great that you were able to connect with someone who understands and has walked in your shoes.

Rich said...

Very cute Jude...
VERY impressed Em, I could not have come up with a better reply if one of my students had asked me what to do... Sadly some in my family are very hmmm, "Ethnically Challenged", and are more then rude to other people, I do dislike it, in this day and age, it's time to grow up... (and they are the ones 2x older then me!)...

~Amy said...

Love the sweet pics of baby Jude sleeping! So happy to hear that he is giggling so much too, even though it is keeping you awake : )
Look at all Em's boxes! That is wonderful! We sent her some money thru PayPal....so proud of her!

Cjengo said...

Aw thank you Amy! So sweet.