Well it happened........... our first public seizure. Mike had a little money stashed away so for a treat he took us to lunch. Once in the eatery Jude's eyes started flashing up in that tell tell sign that he is about to have a seizure. I grabbed Mike's arm, and he looked towards Jude's car seat quietly saying, "he is about to start". So I calmly walked over, and took him out of his car seat, and the audible yelp started. So I gathered his blanket, and took Jude outside where we sat on a seat on the nice sunny day. A few people stared as they walked by, and one lady waited in her car to see if she could help, or to see what was wrong. She finally grudgingly drove away because I think she sensed I had done this before. Once Jude was just twitching, and not yelping anymore I took him back into the resteraunt with only a few glares. I actually felt very comfortable, and knew that everything would be alright. I also realized in a sense that everything wasn't alright........and never would be. Does the combination confuse you? Let me explain that it's as if we know it's not okay, but we are okay personally, if that explains our situation any better. So they brought our food, and Mike and I switched off eating with the baby in one arm. Emily was there too, and handled everything very well.
We then left and walked the sidewalks of the shopping centers in the brisk pre- spring wind, and stared at pretty objects we shouldn't waist our money on. Admitting to ourselves that we may no longer be able to afford them, but knowing they don't matter anyway. We looked at pretty objects for the house, softball bats, clothes, benches, books, and strolled along the sidewalk in the sunshine. Then we stopped, and I saw a picture frame that made me tear up for a second and I grabbed Mike's arm. It said "Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, it's learning how to dance in the rain". He smiled at me, and we saw the red tag marked 75% off clearance and he got it for me. So I took it home, and carefully searched for pictures to go inside of it. I put two of Jude, 1 of Em, and 1 of Mike and I. Then I carefully hung it on the wall. I keep passing by it in the hallway, and smiling each time I do because the white words that scroll across the dark red paint are so true. Life truly does change in a situation like ours which is a situation that afflicts so many others. I am thankful for our life though, and thankful to Jude. He has taught me to appreciate more in life, and to see things in a way I never would have before. I am thankful to our tiny little peanut, and I hope he knows it.