Conflicted

I am conflicted today........at a loss of words.....maybe. I had a little time this morning to post my blog, but I could find the right things to say. Yesterday I received an email from my friend Linda. We have been friends for a long time, and our kids have grown up together, and she told me some dreadful news. An old friend of ours just had a civil suit filed on her because she confessed to embezzling almost 2 million dollars from her company. I read the article, and the suit with my mouth hanging open. The sum of 2 million echoed through my head, and I wasn't sure how to respond. I knew her husband had lost his job, I knew she had been very ill, but I never would have guessed something like this would happen. She was one of the nicest, most kind people I had ever met, and I wasn't sure how to react. I wasn't sure if I should be angry, sad, or how to feel. I finally decided that this is something the criminal system will handle, and that what mattered was she was my friend, and will continue to be. I am not sure her reasoning nor is it any of my business, and honestly I am not sure I will hear from her again. Sometimes we all pass judgement to quickly (ie the Jon Benet case, and her poor mother died before she was exonerated) so it is not up to me to judge. I am sure she will be tried in a court of law, but in the end all I can do is be her friend. She was always supportive of my family, so I owe her the same respect. I guess sometimes good people do bad things.......and then they pay the consequence. Her family, her children, and all are in my prayers.

Jude is doing well today, he has eaten on time, and Mike said he is very smiley, and playful today. I get so down that I cannot see him today. Last night I found myself growing very angry at Mike that he is in my position at home and I am working. I knew that was wrong because I have an incredible job, and he is an incredible dad. I have since worked on getting my feelings in check. As stated I hear the first year after your child is diagnosed with irreversible brain damage is a roller coaster of ups and downs.

I will say Mike is cracking me up today because he is at home cleaning out our fridge. Emily and I have a bit of an obsession with pickles......all kinds of pickles. So I received a text (that has been edited) "How many pickles are in the fridge? I feel like the count on sesame street.......eight eight jars of pickles" Then he called me a pickle freak.

Saturday Emily will be dropping off 42 boxes to Children's hospital in Dallas. We will then begin getting all her Christmas boxes together. If you would like to help fill them please consider donating. You can see her site at www.emilyssmileboxes.com.