Saturday, September 20, 2008

I escaped

I escaped from my cage today because Mike took me out, and it was NICE. We didn't just go out we had a DAY out! First, off Emily had a softball game so we went and even took Jude. I tried to dress him in his baseball outfit, but he is still to tiny for it. Then we went home to eat, rest, and change. We then left and went to Target (to spend a gift card), by Mike's mom, and then he took me for sushi!!! It was the most eventful day I have had in awhile, and I got to spend it with my two guys (Em was with her daddy). Mike was worried about taking the baby in a restaurant, but I assured him he would be fine. He slept through the entire meal and was a wonderful baby. Mike and I chatted through our sushi about Jude's possible future issues or the lack there of. We discussed how he may just be very brilliant, and regardless of which way he turns we will love him dearly. Mike told me how beautiful he thinks I am (smile), and how proud of his little boy he is. Then he said that he has wanted a baby for so long, and how lucky he is because he got two a boy and a girl. He loves Emily very much and that makes me happy. We then chatted about how we wished I had never gone for that fateful level 2 sonogram that led to our months of stress. I said "honestly if this was Emily we STILL wouldn't know there were any issues at all if there were we wouldn't have noticed until she acted different". While we were at Mike's moms house I began to realize that in a few weeks Jude will be coming to her house on a daily basis to drop Jude off while I work. I felt myself growing sad because I realized I will have to leave my son. I began to scan Mike's moms aged face and body wondering if her age will create issues with the baby. What if she fell? What if she tripped? Then I realized that there is really nothing that can pry that baby from her hands. I still would be at home though if we could afford it. It makes you wish at times that things were still how they were when the dads went to work and the moms stayed home. Plus now we have medical bills, but you know what?? I am not that worried about it because things always have a way of working out. Anyway, Jude was passed around his moms when neighbors, etc showed up to see him, but it was sweet. A lady even brought me a sling which I really needed because Jude likes to be held all the time which limits my cleaning time. Mike mentioned at dinner tonight how we were an old married couple now. I assured him that wasn't the case, and how this time around I will merge everything well. With Em I was a first time mom and I neglected myself, my husband, etc. This time I will love my baby, love myself, and my husband! I will still allow myself to look good, go out, pay attention to my husband, and love my baby as much as I can. I think this is vital because a marriage can suffer if you don't pay attention to it. I can tell you that the older I get the more appreciative I am of my life as a whole, the more confident I am in myself as a person, and the more love I have to give. I am very proud of my beautiful daughter, and son regardless of any issues!
By the way did I mention I dyed my hair brown??? UM yeah! I have never had my hair anything but blonde!!!! I will post a pic, but it is a bit fuzzy and I am a bit pudgy in it. My poor hubby keeps hearing me gripe about my weight, but I am confident it will all come off. What do you think of the hair?
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1 comment:

Holly Mackerel said...

Dude, that's dark blonde, not brown! I think it looks AWESOME!!!!