Wed

Well tomorrow we take Jude to see the urologist and we will see what he says about the hydrocele issue. I will be sure to post tomorrow night when we return. Emily also has the second part of her softball tournament so it will be later in the night when I write. So I went home, and told Mike about the infantile seizure videos I found online. I explained that one baby did the same throwing his arms in the air movement that Jude does. Jude also still arches his back and yells, but again it's hard to tell baby things and neurological disorder issues. While in the bath last night I really contemplated on the medical community and research done in Jude's area. We have research in most fields and aspects of medicine, but the neurological standpoint is still so vague. If I could do anything in life it would be to open a medical facility in FT Worth or Dallas solely focused on the brain. I would love to have a place where scientific research is done, therapy, and focus groups. Maybe the Jude Michael neurological center? Can you imagine raising funds for something like that though? I would also want it to be made available to EVERYONE even those who has issues with insurance. I would like it to focus on children - teens diagnosed in the womb, born with issues, or in accidents. The brain is so different from say the heart for several reasons. First off if you have a defect with the heart or a heart attack a doctor can predict your ailments and outcome. If you have a brain injury the doctor can never predict what the outcome may be unless it's brain death of course. There are people walking around with part of their brains missing and you would never know. People that have parts smaller than others, a build up of fluid, etc. One person may be profoundly retarded and the next somehow compensates. The brain is a strange organ and cannot be predicted. I know Cooks, Children's, St Jude's, and others work on neurological problems, but it would be nice to have a center that FOCUSES solely on that. I know when I found out I was carrying a child with potential problems I had nowhere to turn. I felt lost and very alone. I think it would be nice to have a center where people can visit, and have support groups for parents. So that's my thoughts for the day, but I have no idea where to start. Anyone know someone that can donate land, a builder who will donate a build job, etc etc? lol!!!!!

So my other issue is Emily. I emailed her father this morning and told him I was shipping her to military school. He thought that was pretty funny. She has been ORNERY and flat out mean! Yesterday Mike's mom was doing some laundry and asked Emily to help her figure out the dryer. Em just sat there so I told her to go help she muttered sighed and yelled "I DON'T WANT TO! I ALREADY SHOWED HER HOW". Then she stomped over, and it turns out it was her laundry anyway! So then Suzy tried to tell her it's ok she is upset and hug her and she pushed the old woman and said NO! Omg, ummmmmmm breath Jenn it's not legal to hurt the kid. Anyway, this is unlike my child. That was just the tip of it too because there is a lot more. She tried to tell her dad that the reason she was being this was was because Mike's sweet mom gets on her nerves because she is watching her all the time. I said "That's impossible Joe because she stays downstairs with the baby and Em is upstairs and Suzy won't go upstairs with the baby". So she is telling fibs. She comes home from her house fibbing too about his family, and I know she is. Oh and no she is not jealous, she is getting attention, she is not over tired, she is just being NAUGHTY! Her dad is being great though and backing me up. He said he believes she is trying to push me to see what she can get away with because she is becoming a pre teen. So we decided together that at the first sign of being hateful she goes to her room for the night......end of story! No more softy mom.............hopefully it goes well. I always feel bad when she gets in trouble, but she needs to be herself and this isn't her.

Ok have a great day!