Monday, February 14, 2011

A little rant about today....

It's been an interesting Monday filled with lots of business phone calls, and lot's of other drama. I figured my day would be filled with lots of emails regarding claims and billing questions, but the day laid path to many other emails too. I mentioned that I have a new venture regarding a pageant system that focuses on the inner and outer beauty of girls. I feel like if you focus on the inner beauty of a person than they will in turn find their outer beauty regardless of how someone perceives them, and they will let that beauty shine. Well it seems the date of my self proposed exciting campaign fell on top of another systems dates. I was up front and honest by emailing the other director telling her that there may be a conflict of schedules. I offered to search for new dates, but my contacts had few dates available.

I guess the failure to move my date upset this person very much. I received very upsetting emails today. I am a pretty innocent and naive person to a fault. I figure everyone will find in their heart to understand every situation. I received an email today with horrible nasty remarks including ones that said I was an evil person, and that she hopes I can actually sleep with my kids at night. I tried not to let it get to me, I really did......yet I am still stewing at 11pm.  The person in question has suffered the ultimate tragedy by losing a child, a child whose funeral I attended. It was honestly the saddest funeral I have ever been to. Her daughter was such a beautiful person. Yet tonight as I was hooking up Jude's IV feed into his belly I thought about the situation. I wondered about how my ex friend would have reacted if her child had survived her accident, but needed 24 hour care like Jude.  I know in my heart that she would have attended to her daughter on hand and foot. So since I figured she would have tended to her child as I do mine, I wondered how she could think so ill of made no sense, and for once it made me ANGRY! Because a person that holds that type of character should KNOW what someone elses intentions are.  I am a pretty good person. I do for others, I love everyone, I want the best for all those that I encounter, so how dare someone question my integrity. I loved her daughter, and her. It breaks my heart....and makes me...........angry. 

So I WILL march forward with my endeavor! I have the best of friends standing behind me (you know who you are). I will show that glitter and gold and can be show through someones soul.

Jude has done well tonight, but probably has not received the attention he deserves because I was distracted, and I hate that. Many of you won't understand my rant, but many will. I just needed to get it off my chest.


Katy said...

I had something similar happen to me in college. I had a girl think that I was "stealing" her idea. When I called and asked if we could combine forces, she pretty much laughed in my face. Later a faculty member forced her to do it. All I can say is that she must feel threaten by the situation in some way. I would be up-front and just tell her one thing: I never meant to hurt you. That is the truth. Maybe she sees something else there, but you did not mean to hurt her. Then you can go on knowing you did the best you could.

x o x o u i said...

I'm sorry that person has had to endurse so much sorrow, but....calling you an evil person?!!! Maybe she was having a bad day?!

I agree with Katy, but you know I just couldn't be as zen-like. heehee

You have an incredible amount of stress in your life, so I can see how you have learned to downplay some of the nastiness in order to stave off feeling stressed or hurt or angry.

Personally, I think that you feeling angry is a healthy thing. (If that makes any sense.)

A Girl Named Me said...

Seems like she's feeling threatened. Perhaps at the prospect of your event attracting more attention and doing better than her event.

When people feel threatened, they lash out.

I'm sorry you had to be on the receiving end of this. What a rough thing to go through at the beginning of your new venture.