I am exhausted, literally. Ever have one of those times when you just lose it? Yep, that was me last night. I know other mothers understand, and I am not the only one in this situation. Jude was up, and down again last night. Mike stayed up with him until about 1am, and then came to bed. Once Mike was in bed he couldn't hear Jude anymore, but my mom instincts wouldn't let me tune Jude out. Jude would toss, and turn, whine, and moan. It was awful! We tried to alleviate gas again, but that didn't help. Really the only thing that seemed to help was turning Jude on his left side, and propping his back with a pillow. It's hard because Jude cannot tell us what is wrong so we guess. Is it positioning, is it gas, is it pain from the surgery, or is it Jude being 2?
Well last night at about 3am I just lost it, broke down bawling. I said to Mike that I just cannot do this anymore. It's not that Jude is up, it's that Jude is up, and I have to work the next day. NOT only do I have to work today, I have to literally work all day. I get off work at 5pm here, and I go to a Scentsy party at 5:30pm. My body is so tired. Mike called me at work a little while ago, and said he feels for me. He said he feels like I am close to losing it, and that I never lose it, all from lack of sleep. He said he would take Jude tonight so I can get a full nights sleep. I am sure this will help.
Like I said, I know several moms with special needs who encounter this inability for our children to sleep. I put a call into the neurologist to see if he has any further advice. This is nothing new with Jude. He has had many sleepless nights prior to the surgery, but we can usually get him back to sleep somewhere. This constant twisting, moving, crying, and moaning ALL night long seems to be a recent thing. I just hope it gets resolved soon.