Friday, December 11, 2009


Yesterday was a very difficult day! Mike called me about noon in tears because Jude was not eating again. He was so frustrated that there was no calming him down in any form or fashion. I explained to him that his stress was probably relating to the fact that Jude wouldn't eat, but again, nothing would calm him down. He just melted and even went so far as to wonder if we made the right decision in having Jude. It's natural, he just broke, and he has a right to. I am so limited as to what I can do from work, but I hopped on the phone and called my cousin who is just a few minutes away, and she agreed to go over and help.

She said she sat there for an hour trying to feed Jude, but he would just scream at her, and refuse to eat. She said that she could see why Mike gets so frustrated, and that after forty five minutes she was ready to pull her hair out. She was wonderful though, and talked to Mike for awhile. I really think she helped calm him down, and I then counted the hours to go home, and help Mike. Once I walked in I cooked dinner quickly, and then took Jude. I had stopped at the store and gotten Jude some of the pre-mixed Similac bottles he liked, and I put one of the smaller nipples on the bottle. He ended up drinking the whole 8 ounces, and then he took 2 more when I gave him his medication. So in all he had about 20 ounces yesterday which is fine, but not enough. We have made the decision to get the G button, but I am trying to hold out until after the holidays.

After Jude took his last two ounces we all three went to bed. Jude was a bit fussy so I put him in bed with us, and woke up about 1am with him still in bed with us just snoozing away. I put him in his playpen, and he was still sleeping when I left this morning. So at least his schedule is getting back to normal. I just hope the G button will relieve some of Mike's stress. I feel at such a loss that I am at work and cannot care for both of them while I am here. I want to put my hair out at times!

On a good note, Jude was "talking" up a storm again last night while he was laying in bed with us, it was very cute.


Anonymous said...

Hi Jenn,

I know what a tough decision this has been for you and Mike. I pray that this will give you both the relief you need. It is very brave of you both. And, I think it is probably what is best for Jude for now.

I'm excited to hear about Jude's communication! I just love that little boy! Go get em, Tiger!!!!

Parker & Amy Hendrix

A Girl Named Me said...

I really feel for all of you, Jenn. A very difficult situation. If the G Button will help cut down on the stress of feeding for everyone and get Jude the nutrition he needs, that is the best solution.

As a side note my little boy (now 20) definitely had a preference in bottle / nipple types when he was a little one. If I only took the ones he didn't like to daycare, he would really and truly go all day without eating.

Best to you and your family. xo

jocalyn said...

Tough decision. I know. But it makes it so much easier on everyone.

Let me know if you would like a surgeon recommendation. We know a great one.

Also, call us over the holidays if you have some time off. It may help to see another baby similar to Jude and familiarize yourself with it all. It helped us a ton knowing what to expect.

I don't regret our decision one bit. And seriously wonder why I didn't do it sooner.

Our of curiousity, how much formula does your Dr. think Jude needs?

Amber said...

In my opinion...feeding is by far the most frustrating issue. They need to do it to survive and you can't MAKE them do it.
I'm glad you feel peace about the g-tube...I pray that it lifts the stress of at least this area. Grace *who has the worst immune system* never had one problem with infection due to her button. It was very much a life saver for us. There was an initial adjustment after placement...but definitely "do-able".
I can't imagine how difficult it must be for you at work...worrying about home! yuck

Candace said...

Jenn, I know how hard it has been. My heart breaks for you because I was there too. I am going to email you some pics of Faith's Genie tube so you can see some different ones. Our ped. surgeon developed this tube style with his partner. We love it. And I bet that once he does get his and you become adjusted to it you will wonder how you lived without it. It was such a stress reliever for our whole family and now she gets what she needs. She did have some granulation tissue for a short time while she healed but that was just in the first couple of months off and on and then it's never been back in 5 yrs! I pray that you can have some peace and that it alleviates a lot of Jude's suffering.

Bronx Cataldo's said...

you know I went through every bottle on the market to see what one he would drink out of. Finnian was still drinking from a bottle and he was almost 3 I didn't care. He could only use cups without the vavles in them so everything would spill any I knew he wasn't getting enough fluids. Istill have bottles and he will be 5 the end of January but now I use them to tote around his "milk" in them. The g-tube was a saviour for us and it saved his lungs too he cannot take any fluid via mouth but he can eat food.

kate c said...

I'm so glad you decided to go for the g-tube. I've been following your blog but was hesitant to comment because I know it's a tough decision & you didn't a stranger's opinion. Feeding my son & thinking about my son eating took up my whole day/life. It was so stressful. Miles has had a g-tube for almost 2 yrs now. We've never had a problem with infection, he's never been hospitalized, & when he's sick or teething molars we've never had to worry about dehydration. It's really been a life-saver.
& it's NOT failing - you did the best you could & now you will have so much more time for therapies, playtime, etc.

Katy said...

If the g-tube is going to relieve some of your stress, then don't feel bad about it.

Charlie went through the EXACT same thing with the bottles--only certain nipples would do and he did not like the silicone kind--only the cheapie ones like the hospital. Also, he went through a stage at about 18 months where he would only drink from an open cup! We endured a lot of mess around here keeping him hydrated.

Our Journey said...

very hard decision, but you are making the right choice. remember, just because the button is there you dont have to use it all the time, use it when he has his moments or when hes sick.. we didnt use frankies for close to a year after he got it..

dr miller at cooks is awesome, (if you dont have a surgeon yet)