Wednesday, September 17, 2014

Wed night update

Jude's x rays and blood still look normal so he is still a mystery. It's possible he has a virus on top of the other issues he has been fighting. We just don't know the difference between the mild illness and the serious one anymore. Mike said they are talking about bringing in a specialist regarding the pump and I think that's a wise idea! Jude seems to cycle throughout the day through phases of being alright and then having issues with his o2, tone, temperature, urine output, lethargic, pale, etc. Jude has been admitted so I am sure we will find out more tomorrow. As hard as it is being away from him I am at home tonight. I will sleep tonight and then switch off tomorrow night. I guess we have learned how to conserve our energy in hospital settings.

Mike called me earlier and was pretty upset which is understandable. I think we are both so exhausted that you start playing every scenario in your head. You play them all even the worst ones. Whether those scenarios are valid or not when your mental state isn't stable you cannot help put think of them. So forgive us if we cry on you or say things that might not come to pass.

I have mentioned I wonder about taking Jude into the hospital. Today Charlotte called with reason and said Jude needed to be seen. Sometimes I wonder if the doctors aren't at a loss and just done with us. I wonder as much as I hate the word if Hospice could be helpful for Jude. If maybe their understanding of chronically ill patients could benefit him in some way. I don't know. Not sure what I know anymore. Not sure if it's good for Jude to be in the hospital and not sure anything would ever change bringing him home.

We appreciate everyones prayers and concerns. Mike and I are both pretty public and our emotions play out like a play on the set of a stage. We appreciate everyone bearing with us and all your sweet messages. We will get back to them as soon as we can and will update when we know more.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

What about palliative care? Most hospice groups offer this kind of care. It's an easier concept to deal with.