Friday, August 23, 2013

WHEW what a busy bee!!! A look at mourning and an update on Jude.

It's been a week that's for sure. I am grateful for my family and my job, but holy cow I am ready to lay down! Emily had freshman camp on Monday night from 6-9, then Tuesday she had another event, Wednesday she had cheer, Thursday I rushed the cat to the vet than ran home to rush her to cheer and back to pick her up, and tonight Mike has an event. Whew, I think high school may break me...giggle.

Poor Jude is just not doing well with his legs. Yesterday Charlotte had to give him Valium again due his pain level. So therefore I made an appointment with the ortho for next Wednesday around noon. However, the ortho isn't convinced this is related to his legs and wants us to watch for signs of illness. I guess we will find out the root cause on Wednesday.........hopefully. You know how that goes, it's a guessing game with Jude.

I was discussing the most recent events I have been blogging about with a colleague. We started discussing mourning and we talked about how I mourned for the child we thought Jude would be. It took about two years for us to get back to "normal". We accepted Jude the way he was and we were grateful he was with us, but it wasn't the life we planned. It also took me about two years to realize it was okay to feel the way I did without feeling guilty about it. We then started talking about losses in our lives and how individuals deal with death. I told her the only way I can describe losing someone very close (like my mom and Chris)  is like there is a huge empty hole in the pit of your stomach. This hole is so deep that there is no end to it and you feel like it's filled with ulcers and just festering up into your throat until you can barely breathe. That at first the people that are trying to help you fill that hole only make the irritation of the ulcers worse. However, over time those same people bring shovels and slowly start filling that hole up with memories and hope. Then you begin to realize that the hole has started closing in and even though it's never filled up to the top again it's bearable and you can begin to move forward.

So on to something more positive. As I mentioned before I started taking Plexus Slim. I am one of those people that believe that diet and exercise are the only true way to lose weight and keep it off. However, I caved and I tried Plexus Slim. I just want to say I feel SO much better! I am more energized, I feel healthier, and yes I am even losing weight. However, I would drink the all natural pink drink the AM just for my health. So why am I blogging about this? Do I sell it? Yes. However, I would encourage you to try it whether it's from me or someone else. I just feel compelled to try to share this with people! My co-worker Chandi is now on it and she always lost 3.5 pounds in 2 days and she said she feels "very energized and better".

This weekend we are spending a girls day tomorrow with some close friends and then Sunday we are cleaning for Jude's birthday next weekend and then BACK to cheer! I am proud of Emily for tackling this cheer group. It's for beginners and they are spending 5 hours a week teaching her choreography for a dance and beginning tumbling. In 2 weeks she already has most the dance down and almost has her backbend walk over. I also think it's giving her some much needed social time and she gets her work outs she needs for Miss Teen. We did get Emily's shots back for her miss Teen headshot and they are PHENOMENAL! I cannot wait to see them completed!

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