Why Am I Sick?

I haven't blogged in awhile again but thought I would today because it always helped me with Jude and maybe it will help now. I am sick again, diagnosed with "community acquired pneumonia", yea I have no clue either. Last week my right ear started hurting but other than feeling run down I didn't have any other symptoms. Saturday evening my husband started complaining he was not feeling well and by Sunday morning he was at Minute Clinic diagnosed with Bronchitis and a host of medications. On Monday morning I woke up feeling TERRIBLE. So I also went to our friendly neighborhood Minute Clinic too, I love the doctor up there. She spent a lot of time with me and I figured I would get the same diagnosis as Mike and get sent on my way. I was wrong. 

The doctor said I had zero movement in my right middle lung and with the fever that led to the pneumonia diagnoses. Read until the end of this blog because I am not just complaining my writing has a purpose. So the doctor asked if she could be blunt and I told her I prefer blunt. She said, "Between the lengthy trauma you guys faced, the grief, and the invasive virus that attacked your facial nerves, your immune system is shot!" (no kidding) She went on, "It will never be the same but I am worried if we don't get it stimulated somehow you won't make it to 70." Wait what? Okay whoa doctor that was too blunt. She explained that I would run out of medication options. So she had me pick up some Vitamin D3, prescribed me a healthy dose of antibiotic, and suggested an immunologist. She did go through a host of questions which I found interesting. Of course she swirled around if I smoke or vape multiple times (I don't) but what was most fascinating is she asked if I live in a new home. I told her I didn't and she confirmed that was a good thing because many new homes carry mold and toxic issues. Interesting since I have a friend that is SO sick from mold in a new house. 

I told her I have tried CBD oil (made it 100 times worse), juice diet, Keto, celery juice in the morning, supplements,  etc etc. She laughed at most of it and other times she nodded her head in agreement. I told her I like to walk and that helps unless I am sick and she agreed that is helpful. I explained that I have learned to treat my eye issue with rest and non-conventional medications, she seemed to like that. She was kind and just said basically that this is trauma and the body's reaction to trauma both through Jude, my life, and now the virus that attacked. So the reactions I get when people hear I am sick is "again?", why?", "what's causing it?".  I don't mind but if it annoys you just think how annoyed I am. I am not a stay at home type of person and I feel trapped at home. 

I almost feel like this is comparable to Mike's heart situation, everyone has an opinion and we appreciate it but not all health issues fit in a bubble. Mike had nothing structurally wrong with his heart and zero blockage he just got a nasty virus called myocarditis combined with pericarditis that attacked his heart muscle. Why? Trauma and grief. We work through our grief each day but I would love for everyone to take one step back today. Imagine not sleeping correctly for 7 years and being constantly stressed for 7 years then after that 7 years you spend the rest of the time grieving. We were in and out of hospitals racking up viruses and bacteria's in our bodies like MRSA Staphylococcus. That's a booger to deal with. 

I have learned to tell people no when asked to go out. I have learned to rest when I need to and that the world will keep turning. I am still learning to balance work and health but it will happen. Regardless it's just the side-effects of a traumatic situation that no one could have avoided and one we wouldn't ever take back.