Friday, November 18, 2011

Turkey cards and Tears

On Wednesday night we had the contractor that converted our dining room into Jude's room over to estimate converting our closet into Jude's bathroom. I wasn't expecting to get choked up, but I did and I am not sure why. We were standing there in my very unorganized closet and I just .........shut down. Mike kept mentioning the type of bath chair Jude needs. The nurse prefers one that rolls into the bathroom and then lays back into a flat surface. I listened to everyone talk about what will be best as Jude grows older and I just stayed quiet. They discussed door widths, rolling surfaces, a sink for his medication, and more. When we moved in Mike and I discussed re-doing our bathroom with a bigger tub and nicer tile, but I guess I never considered my closet would need to become a full wet bathroom for Jude. I want what is best for him, but it's still a little difficult to think about it all sometimes. I was very overwhelmed and I still am. I think I need a few days to decompress and take the remodel in.

When I got home last night Mike was insisting on showing me the video about the teacher that was mistreating his special needs student. I explained to Mike that I really didn't want to see the video because I am well aware of the cruelty in the world. He really wanted me to see it so I took a few minutes to watch the clip until I couldn't take anymore. I am very grateful for Jude's nurse, his teachers, and the school district we live in. Our school district has been amazing to Jude and to Emily. Emily is visiting a performing arts school today and deciding if she wants to audition to try for a scholarship next year. I struggle with this idea because I love her school so much. It will be a family decision based on her visit today.

A reflection of Jude's teacher is shown in Jude's Thanksgiving card to his family. When I opened it last night I was a bit speechless. I didn't cry I just sat and looked at the outline of Jude's tiny hand making the staple Thanksgiving Turkey. I have Emily's when she was tiny and now I have Jude's. I never thought I would have Jude's turkey hand. Our nurse explained what a tedious task it was for Jude's teacher to obtain this artwork. She was insitant she was going to work with Jude to complete the piece and with Jude in smiles she did just that.

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