Happy Birthday my darling son!

Today I refrained from posting on my Facebook (my primary social network communication) regarding Jude's birthday. I have posted throughout the week on Facebook regarding Jude's birthday party were holding for him on Saturday. I debated on what to post today when his actual 5th birthday rolled around, but my amazing husband summed up everything I was thinking with the following post.

"Five years ago today, you came into my life. I was so scared and unsure how we were going to care for you. Words at the time, which I hated to hear, 'God has a plan' only confused me more. A plan? What plan includes ME to care for a child that will be totally dependent on ME for the rest of his life?
I firmly believe we all have a few moments in our lives when we have to make hard choices. Ch...oices that will define us for who we are and who we will be. Sometimes those choices are opportunities for us to grow, to evolve as a person. In my young adult life I made so many selfish wrong choices, and ran from opportunities. You were my saving grace. You were my redemption, my chance once more to do the right thing no matter the cost. Jude, it hasn't been an easy 5 years, and recently we became aware of another hurdle for us to clear together. We will make it through.
Five years ago today, I promised God and you that if He got you here I'd carry you the rest of the way. I love you Son! You by far are the best thing I have ever done in this life. I thank you for teaching me patience, I'm still a student, I haven't mastered it yet. Happy Birthday Jude, I love you"\

 

Many new parents walk into a sonogram room and learn the sex of their beloved child. We walked in to learn "It's a boy"...........followed by.............."there might be a problem". We were told to decide if we would continue a pregnancy that might not have the perfect outcome, but might have the worst possible scenario. It's funny that over time their "Worst possible scenario" has become our incredible blessing.

 

Despite Emily's amazing dedication to her brother through Emily's Smile Boxes, Emily has recently really learned what it takes to dedicate yourself to a disabled family member. I have heard "It's not fair", "Why is my life different", and "it's always about Jude" only to be followed with a teenagers big blue eyes looking for reassurance. She understands Jude's needs.........it's just that sometimes ......... well it's just hard! It took two 40 year old adults five years to realize what an amazing life we have  so you can only imagine the time it takes for a teenagers to learn. However, today when we flew back from a very short trip to Miss Texas for Emily to reign.......I got little resistance. In fact tonight I got a child that came to me today as I was getting ready for bed that truly understood what it meant to be a role model. We talked about Miley, Justin, and more and how people choose to be in the limelight. She said "You choose to be a role model and you can choose to stop!".

 

Jude has taught me to tell people when I love them, have patience, voice my opinion, love unconditionally, to always check for a temperature, to enjoy the silence (Ginger/Kel will get this), encourage the weak, love the strong, be thankful for my job, speak up when someone is a blessing, ignore those that don't know your mission, always think beyond yourself, and to love a child like there is no tomorrow!!

 

With that I will leave you with my song that always reminds me of Jude!

 

Five years old? Bring on the next five! Let's prove the doctor wrong .... together. I love you Jude with all my heart and soul! In my eyes you are perfect!!!!