I have decided that this past year has been a time of enlightenment for me on many levels. I think approaching 50 years old and a worldwide pandemic has opened my eyes to so many things. I have always been very opinionated especially when it came to issues I felt went against my moral values. I also have always believe in educating yourself. If someone spoke about something that was historically or statistically inaccurate I would kindly correct them. In my youngers years I was also very quick to get frustrated with situations that were stressful or difficult to deal with. If you have followed my blog for the last 13 years you also know I was always on the go with a new adventure or a new place to visit.
I am no longer that person and I like it. Not everyone will like the new me and that's okay. I like my quiet time, being at home, being slow, and being mellow. I now literally stop myself from replying to others asking myself if my opinion on the matter they posted or spoke about is truly important. Is what I am going to say going to make a true difference in the world at hand and if not I move on. In my line of work we sometimes get very angry customers and in the service industry as a whole people can see very upset individuals. I wonder if we just took a moment to take a deep breath before we reacted if the outcome would be different. I am not saying we shouldn't ever get upset or allow someone to wrong us in our lives but I have just personally decided to try to let things go. To take in as much positive as I can.
This past year I thought I was helping a friend by advising a companion was not faithful and wasn't extending decency when talking about my friend. Although I felt in my heart I was doing the right thing by warning her it backfired. Then recently I commented on a social media post (damn social media) and it was taken out of context. It was on a touchy subject and I was just trying to be supportive. So I decided to just stop commenting on anything that could be construed as political, religious, pandemic associated, or relationship geared. I had someone bring up a political opinion the other day and I just simply replied that politics aren't my job and I no longer discuss them. God didn't put me here to prove my side is the right side because it may not be. I found a quote that says, "You cannot control how other people receive your energy. Anything you do or say gets filtered through the lens of whatever personal stuff they are going through at the moment. Which is not about you. Just keep doing your thing with as much integrity and love as possible." That resonated with me because it's so true!! If politics, masks, work, depression, joy, hate, fear, life, babies, whatever is on your mind will filter what you are reading and perceiving. That can affect your reaction and my reaction to any given situation at hand. My mother used to always tell me to walk away from a situation for five minutes and breathe before I spoke. Those were some words of wisdom right there folks! I should have listened.
I guess with everything that has happened in my life since I was 7 years old I just started to wind down. Long quiet cool evenings sitting out on my patio while listening to the wind in the trees and the birds makes me very happy right now. Living at a slower pace and taking in all I can while I still can means more than I can say. I hear Jude all around me out on our land and see him in the dragonflies that flutter by my hands. I don't miss the traffic or the busy hustle but I do miss my friends and enjoy seeing them again. I am not sure I ever really grasped that when I retire I want a quiet life away from the commotion with my dogs and animals but I understand that now. In the meantime I am still extremely grateful that my business is still so successful while I work from home and it's because of all my loyal friends, family, and clientele.
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