What does Graham Allen say?, "Watch out America because this one's going to sting!" It stung me but I learned from it.
I have taken on a new position at work so I don't have much time to blog anymore. However I decided to take a mini lunch break today to check my Facebook and update my blog.
About a year ago I posted a blog with the link to an article about the circle theory. Basically it works like this. If a person is affected by a tragedy or major situation then you place that person and their immediate family (spouse and children) in the inner most part of the circle. Then you draw additional circles around the middle which associates to the next closest people. So a circle for family, then friends, then co workers, etc, etc. You cannot dump anything negative into the inner circles and you need to refrain from getting involved more than you have been asked to with the inner circles. Even though last year we were the inner most part of the theory I decided to adopt this way of thinking in my regular life and I can report a year later it's been amazing! I figured this circle theory could apply to more than just tragedies and personal struggles.
In other words I withdrew myself as much as possible from any negativity, drama, or tragic situations that I should not be personally involved in. If I have a friend or family member that has a situation going on then I let them know I am here if they need me and I step back until I am asked for help. I have realized people's personal tragedies and circumstances are not my own personal drama's. So if there is a divorce, a drug situation, a death, problems in a marriage, school issues, a separation, a child drop out of school, or other issues I realize it's not my personal drama. Nor is my opinion needed or requested unless it's been personally asked for. My friends and my family know I am there if they need me but me sitting around participating in dramatic conversations that only lead to further frustrations doesn't help. Me sitting around being worried and stressed over a situation out of my control, does not help. So I take care of what I can in my own immediate family's life, I realize before I judge that my mirror is dirty too, and I let those I love know I am there is they want and need me there.
I am not saying I won't speak up if someone is being abused or mistreated because I will. However eliminating situations out of my life that my opinion and decisions have no bearing on has had a significant difference in my personal stress level. I for one really like the circle theory!