After Jude passed a good friend of mine really wanted to help us by doing what she could to make sure the 9/24 event for Emily's Smile Boxes was a success. She told me she reached out to a mom who had lost her son who also held a race in his honor. My friend explained she was excited and really just wanted to make a difference and it was the mom she reached out to that pulled the reigns. She told her that she couldn't step in my grief garden right now and she needed to wait until she was invited in. That statement stuck with me but I just haven't had the opportunity to blog on it in the way I wanted to. I thought her statement was very profound. That mom knew my friend only wanted to help but she knew from a grieving parents side that you have to learn to breathe again first.
I thought that the idea of a grief garden (even though not literal) was amazng and a great way to explain the situation in a sense that others could understand. Basically when Jude first passed I was in a dark sad stormy garden without much light. As the days passed and the storm let up I began to start tending to some wildflowers. Slowly I began to work with the green grass, some honeysuckle filled with memories, and I was able to plant some roses. The roses will take the longest as they are just beginning to grow but eventually their petals will bloom with a sweet fragrance and be filled with Jude's smiles. A little at a time I can invite people in to look at how beautiful the garden has grown but it takes months and years to make the perfect rose garden. It will happen though and it will be perfect.