Tonight Mike went to the Dallas Cowboys game........without me...insert evil eyes. It's really okay because I wanted him to go have a wonderful time with his friends because he deserves it. So we had a nice relaxing evening at home. Emily has been doing homework and Jude and I went for our nightly walk. Once we got home from our walk I began to get Jude ready for bed, like I always do. I changed his diaper, put him in his pajamas, positioned him into bed, and readied his medication. I pumped the feeding into his IV bag and positioned the IV line for his G button. Then I began inserting medications. When I got to his sedative I felt a tug.........then a stop..........then my mouth dropped open. I do a lot for Jude........, but Mike replaces the G button (if our nurse is out, but it's only happened twice without her).......I just haven't been able to yet. "Not tonight Lord" I whispered........ "please". I pumped, I plunged, I pushed....I used soda, I used a q tip, I sprayed water all over everywhere due to pressure build up......and the Lord replied "It's time to learn Jennifer". OH NO! PANIC. I calmed my nerves and picked up the phone to call our nurse. "Charlotte" I said meekly. "Jude's button is stuck and I need you to walk me through physically taking it out and replacing it." Let me just tell you that woman is our angel. She spoke to me in a soft gentle manner with clear instructions. I grabbed Jude's G button bag and quickly followed all her commands. I put the water in the new button too make sure the balloon would inflate. I then put K Y jelly on the tip of the new button so it could be inserted easily and quickly. I let the water out of the old button to deflate it and began to tug to pull it out of Jude's stomach.......and he began to scream. I began to cry because I was hurting him and I felt like I was ripping his insides out. Charlotte calmed me down and assured me it was just because the button had been in for a long time. I soon got the button out and cleaned the open wound........and Jude laughed so I breathed a little easier. I inserted the new button and checked for placement. I knew how to check for placement due to the NG tube, but I still worried. Emily stood there the entire time offering her assistance if needed. Near the end of my conversation with Jude I asked Emily to run to get me Motrin which she did. She brought back the whole bottle and then looked at me with a grin. " I guess you need it in a syringe huh". I think we were all very frazzles, but ........we got it done.
Thank God for Charlotte. Like I said........I have done and learned more in the medical field than I ever imagined without a degree, but this I hadn't done yet. What an experience. Whew! You veteran moms are awesome, but I don't like doing that...lol.
** follow up. I had a good cry tonight. I cried because I innocently didn't know how to take care of the G button incident without help and I cried because I SHOULD have known how to without help. It was a conflict of emotions.
1 comment:
I bet you had a great sense of accomplishment once you had your good cry, didn't you?! Everyone can't be an expert in everything, and Mike has been the primary parent dealing with the G button, right? There is NOTHING wrong with that. My hubby is not the primary parent dealing with the issues my boys have~ in 4 years, he has never even MET my little guy's SLP or the pre-k teachers...and he only knows ONE of my big guy's doctors' names.
you are an amazing mom for doing what you have to do for Jude. I worked in a nursing home about 20 years ago, and they had a whole WING of disabled kids whose parents couldn't/wouldn't learn to take care of them. DOn't beat yourself up for not knowing 100% of everything.
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